Santa Banta Jokes Biography
Source(google.com.pk)
Musafir (Gard se): gard saheb kia gari chalne mein itna waqt hai keh main chaye pi aayon.
Gard: is kay yakeen dilane kay liye mein khud aap ke sath chal sakta hon chaye pine kay liye.
Aik aadmi ko buhat pias lagi huyi thi. Woh aik sharbat walay kay pas gia aur kaha mujhay aik glass sharbat do. Phir kaha meri larayi honay wali hai.
Sharbat walay nay dheyan nahi dia aur sharbat ka glass pesh kia.
Woh aadmi sharbat pi kar bola. Mujhay aik glass sharbat aur do meri larayi honay wali hai.
Sharbat walay nay suna magar kuch kaha nahi. Phir is nay kaha.
Sharbat walay nay tisra glass bhi dia aur jab is nay sharbat pi lia to is nay pucha aap ki kis say larayi honay wali hai.
Is aadmi nay kaha. Tum say kiun keh meray pas denay kay liye sharbat kay paisay nahi hain.
Bhikari nay aik aadmi say kaha:khanay ko kuch mil sakta hai?
Is aadmi nay poocha:kal ka salan khalo gay?
Bhikari nay kaha: Ji han koi harj nahi.
Is aadmi nay kaha: acha to phir kal aajana, aaj to ku
Is ne wo ghora saraye kay mulazim ko de kar kaha keh tumhain iski hefazat karni hai. Sath hi is ne yeh sonch ker keh mulazim so na jaye isey lohe ka bana huya aik aalah dia jis se bhison ko nahlate huye ragar ragar kar in kay jism ki gandagi saaf kartay hain aur kaha keh is se ghorey ke jisam ko ragarte ya ghaste rahna. Ye kah ker wo so gia.
Mulazim thuri dair to ghorey ke jism ko lohe ke aaley se ragarta raha. Phir ye soch ker ke yahan konse chor aayen ge main bhi so jata hoon wo bhi so gia.
Sobha jab mulazim utha to ye daikh ker bara pareshan hoya keh ghora chor le gaya hai. Ab malik ko kia jawab de ga. Is ke zehan main aik terkeeb aagaii.
Is ne jaldi se ja ker jungal se aik sufaid rung ka khargosh pakra aur isko lohe ke aaley se ghasna shuroo kar dia. Isi doran malik uth giya aur ghorey ko gayab daikh ker poocha ghora kahan hai aur ye tum kia kar rahe ho.
Mulazim ne khargosh ki taraf ishara kerke kaha. Janab ye ghora hi to hai. Sari raat ghaste ghaste itna sara rah gia. Ab aap batayain aur ghasoon ya bas karoon.
Aik dost (Doosray say): Tumhari ammi ko kaisay pata chala keh tum nay mun nahi dhoya?
Doosra dost : mein sabun bhigona bhool gia tha.
Iqbal (Ahmad say):dunya ka sab say taqat war aadmi kon hai?
Ahmad: traffic police jo sirf hath kay aik isharay say sainkron garyan rok leta hai.
Bhikari (Aadmi say) bhayi do ropay ka sawal hai?
Aadmi : Sirf do rupay hi ka kiun?
Bhikari: Mein aadmi ki awqaat deikh kar hi mangta hon.
Baap (betay say): Tum nay tareekh mein itnay kam number kiun liye hain?
Beta: “ Abbu tareekh kay parchay mein ziadah tar sawalat aisay puchay gaye the jo meri paidaish say pehlay kay the.”
Aik makan main do aadmi apas main lar'rahe the. Aik kah raha tha tum to gadhe kay bache ho. Dusra pehlay ko kah raha tha. Gadhe kay bache to tum ho.
Aik gadha makan ki diwar kay sath bahir khara tha. Itne main is ka aik dost ghora wahan se guzra aur poocha tum yahan kiun khare ho.
Is ne jabab dia mera bacha kahen gum ho gia hai. Is makan se aawazain aarahi hain keh tum gadhe kay bache ho aur tum gadhe kay bache ho. Jab tai ho jaye ga key kaun gadhe ka bacha hai to main is ko apne sath ley jaunga.
Maan…………. “Hamid kiun ro rahe ho?”
Hamid…………..”ammi master saheb bimar the aur wo ………..wo ………..”
Maan………….”Kia hoya margaye kia be chare?”
Hamid………….” Aji kahan margaye………….tandarost hogaye hain.”
Baap bête khana kha rahay the to betay nay kaha: Abbu….
Baap nay kaha: chup karo khana khatay waqt baat nahi kartay.
Jab dono baap beta nay khana kha lia to baap nay kaha: Beta kia keh rahay the?
Betay nay jawab dia: Abbu Salan mein makhi thi woh kha gaye hain.
Aik sabzi farosh kay han bachah paida hua. Parosi waghira dekhnay kay liye aaye huye the.
Aik khatoon nay pucha: bhayi saheb bacha kaisa hai?
Sabzi farosh nay kaha: bilkul taza hai.
Aik shakhs hanpta hua railway incharj kay pas aaya aur kehnay laga.
Janab! Aanay wali rail foran rok di jaye. Rastay mein is kay ulatnay ka khatrah hai.
Chunancha khatray kay pesh nazar rail kehin door rokwa di gayi aur railway kay officer is aadmi kay sath khatray wali jagah ka muaina karnay chalay gaye. Is shakhs nay railway line par paray kelay kay chilkay ki taraf ishara kartay huye kaha: Janab! Rail ko is chilkay say phisal kar ulatnay ka khatra tha.
Aik larka apnay dost ko bata raha tha. Meray Abbu mein bari khubyan hain. Bahadur itnay hain jaisay sher, tandurust itnay hain jitna hathi aur aakhein to baz ki tarah teiz hain.
Doosra dost foran bola: agar hum in ko deikhna chahein to ketnay ka ticket lena hoga.
Mutahin Saheb aik lamhey kay liye kamra imtehan se baher gaye wapis aaye to dekha keh imtahan dene waley chand bachey aik doosrey kay sath baith kar aapus main batein karrahey hain. Mutahin nay foran qareeb aakar poocha yeh kia ho raha hai. Aapni aapni jagha se kiun uth kar yahan aagaye ho? Percha aapas main batain ker ke kiun ker rahe ho.
Bachon mein se aik ne jawab dia hamarey sir ne kaha tha kay har kam aapas mein mil jul kar karna chahiye.
Aik kanjus shaks ki murghi chori hoi is ne faisla kia kay das din tak roti nahi khaye ga takeh mughi ka noksan poora ho jaye do din khana khanay se wo bohat dubla ho giya. Aik din wo shahar jaraha tha rastey mein is sa ziada dubla aadmi mila kanjus is se kahne laga bhayi meri to murghi chori hogayi hai magar yun lagta hai jaisay tumhari bakri khogayi hai.
Aik burhya tangay kay nichay aagayi to sipahi nay tangay walay ko pakr kar poocha. Tum nay burhya ko takkar kiun mari hai?
Tangay wala khamosh khara raha. Burhya kehnay lagi: ab kiun nahi boltay? Pehlay to bara shor macha raha rahay the keh bach mayi bach mayi ….. ab bol.
Aik restaurant mein gahak nay shikayat ki keh mein gosht ka yeh parcha mosalsal 40 minute say katnay ki koshish kar raha hon magar nakam hon.
Aap pareshan mat hon! Behray nay itminan say jawab di restaurant aik bajay tak khula rahe ga.
Yar pareshan kiun ho? Hostel mein rehnay walay aik larkay nay doosray say poocha.
Woh bola kia bataon yar! Ghar khat likha tha keh table lamp khareedna hai paisay bhej dein lekin inhon nay table lamp hi bhej dia hai.
Gayon mein aik shakhs ka inteqaal ho gia aik saheb tazyat kay liye in kay betay kay pas gaye aur poocha marhoom ko kia bimari thi.
Betay nay jawab mein kaha burhapa khood aik bimari hai.
Woh saheb bolay: Waqai hamaray mohallay mein bhi teen char bachay isi bimari mein maray hain.
Aik hotal kay bahir board laga tha keh khanay khoob kaiye bill aap kay potay ada karein gay aik shakhs nay khoob pait bhar kar khana khaya thori der baad wetter bil lay kar aagia who shakhs hairan hua keh yeh bil kaisa hai? Wetter nay kaha yeh is khany ka bill hai jo aap kay DADA na.
Musafir (Gard se): gard saheb kia gari chalne mein itna waqt hai keh main chaye pi aayon.
Gard: is kay yakeen dilane kay liye mein khud aap ke sath chal sakta hon chaye pine kay liye.
Aik aadmi ko buhat pias lagi huyi thi. Woh aik sharbat walay kay pas gia aur kaha mujhay aik glass sharbat do. Phir kaha meri larayi honay wali hai.
Sharbat walay nay dheyan nahi dia aur sharbat ka glass pesh kia.
Woh aadmi sharbat pi kar bola. Mujhay aik glass sharbat aur do meri larayi honay wali hai.
Sharbat walay nay suna magar kuch kaha nahi. Phir is nay kaha.
Sharbat walay nay tisra glass bhi dia aur jab is nay sharbat pi lia to is nay pucha aap ki kis say larayi honay wali hai.
Is aadmi nay kaha. Tum say kiun keh meray pas denay kay liye sharbat kay paisay nahi hain.
Bhikari nay aik aadmi say kaha:khanay ko kuch mil sakta hai?
Is aadmi nay poocha:kal ka salan khalo gay?
Bhikari nay kaha: Ji han koi harj nahi.
Is aadmi nay kaha: acha to phir kal aajana, aaj to ku
Is ne wo ghora saraye kay mulazim ko de kar kaha keh tumhain iski hefazat karni hai. Sath hi is ne yeh sonch ker keh mulazim so na jaye isey lohe ka bana huya aik aalah dia jis se bhison ko nahlate huye ragar ragar kar in kay jism ki gandagi saaf kartay hain aur kaha keh is se ghorey ke jisam ko ragarte ya ghaste rahna. Ye kah ker wo so gia.
Mulazim thuri dair to ghorey ke jism ko lohe ke aaley se ragarta raha. Phir ye soch ker ke yahan konse chor aayen ge main bhi so jata hoon wo bhi so gia.
Sobha jab mulazim utha to ye daikh ker bara pareshan hoya keh ghora chor le gaya hai. Ab malik ko kia jawab de ga. Is ke zehan main aik terkeeb aagaii.
Is ne jaldi se ja ker jungal se aik sufaid rung ka khargosh pakra aur isko lohe ke aaley se ghasna shuroo kar dia. Isi doran malik uth giya aur ghorey ko gayab daikh ker poocha ghora kahan hai aur ye tum kia kar rahe ho.
Mulazim ne khargosh ki taraf ishara kerke kaha. Janab ye ghora hi to hai. Sari raat ghaste ghaste itna sara rah gia. Ab aap batayain aur ghasoon ya bas karoon.
Aik dost (Doosray say): Tumhari ammi ko kaisay pata chala keh tum nay mun nahi dhoya?
Doosra dost : mein sabun bhigona bhool gia tha.
Iqbal (Ahmad say):dunya ka sab say taqat war aadmi kon hai?
Ahmad: traffic police jo sirf hath kay aik isharay say sainkron garyan rok leta hai.
Bhikari (Aadmi say) bhayi do ropay ka sawal hai?
Aadmi : Sirf do rupay hi ka kiun?
Bhikari: Mein aadmi ki awqaat deikh kar hi mangta hon.
Baap (betay say): Tum nay tareekh mein itnay kam number kiun liye hain?
Beta: “ Abbu tareekh kay parchay mein ziadah tar sawalat aisay puchay gaye the jo meri paidaish say pehlay kay the.”
Aik makan main do aadmi apas main lar'rahe the. Aik kah raha tha tum to gadhe kay bache ho. Dusra pehlay ko kah raha tha. Gadhe kay bache to tum ho.
Aik gadha makan ki diwar kay sath bahir khara tha. Itne main is ka aik dost ghora wahan se guzra aur poocha tum yahan kiun khare ho.
Is ne jabab dia mera bacha kahen gum ho gia hai. Is makan se aawazain aarahi hain keh tum gadhe kay bache ho aur tum gadhe kay bache ho. Jab tai ho jaye ga key kaun gadhe ka bacha hai to main is ko apne sath ley jaunga.
Maan…………. “Hamid kiun ro rahe ho?”
Hamid…………..”ammi master saheb bimar the aur wo ………..wo ………..”
Maan………….”Kia hoya margaye kia be chare?”
Hamid………….” Aji kahan margaye………….tandarost hogaye hain.”
Baap bête khana kha rahay the to betay nay kaha: Abbu….
Baap nay kaha: chup karo khana khatay waqt baat nahi kartay.
Jab dono baap beta nay khana kha lia to baap nay kaha: Beta kia keh rahay the?
Betay nay jawab dia: Abbu Salan mein makhi thi woh kha gaye hain.
Aik sabzi farosh kay han bachah paida hua. Parosi waghira dekhnay kay liye aaye huye the.
Aik khatoon nay pucha: bhayi saheb bacha kaisa hai?
Sabzi farosh nay kaha: bilkul taza hai.
Aik shakhs hanpta hua railway incharj kay pas aaya aur kehnay laga.
Janab! Aanay wali rail foran rok di jaye. Rastay mein is kay ulatnay ka khatrah hai.
Chunancha khatray kay pesh nazar rail kehin door rokwa di gayi aur railway kay officer is aadmi kay sath khatray wali jagah ka muaina karnay chalay gaye. Is shakhs nay railway line par paray kelay kay chilkay ki taraf ishara kartay huye kaha: Janab! Rail ko is chilkay say phisal kar ulatnay ka khatra tha.
Aik larka apnay dost ko bata raha tha. Meray Abbu mein bari khubyan hain. Bahadur itnay hain jaisay sher, tandurust itnay hain jitna hathi aur aakhein to baz ki tarah teiz hain.
Doosra dost foran bola: agar hum in ko deikhna chahein to ketnay ka ticket lena hoga.
Mutahin Saheb aik lamhey kay liye kamra imtehan se baher gaye wapis aaye to dekha keh imtahan dene waley chand bachey aik doosrey kay sath baith kar aapus main batein karrahey hain. Mutahin nay foran qareeb aakar poocha yeh kia ho raha hai. Aapni aapni jagha se kiun uth kar yahan aagaye ho? Percha aapas main batain ker ke kiun ker rahe ho.
Bachon mein se aik ne jawab dia hamarey sir ne kaha tha kay har kam aapas mein mil jul kar karna chahiye.
Aik kanjus shaks ki murghi chori hoi is ne faisla kia kay das din tak roti nahi khaye ga takeh mughi ka noksan poora ho jaye do din khana khanay se wo bohat dubla ho giya. Aik din wo shahar jaraha tha rastey mein is sa ziada dubla aadmi mila kanjus is se kahne laga bhayi meri to murghi chori hogayi hai magar yun lagta hai jaisay tumhari bakri khogayi hai.
Aik burhya tangay kay nichay aagayi to sipahi nay tangay walay ko pakr kar poocha. Tum nay burhya ko takkar kiun mari hai?
Tangay wala khamosh khara raha. Burhya kehnay lagi: ab kiun nahi boltay? Pehlay to bara shor macha raha rahay the keh bach mayi bach mayi ….. ab bol.
Aik restaurant mein gahak nay shikayat ki keh mein gosht ka yeh parcha mosalsal 40 minute say katnay ki koshish kar raha hon magar nakam hon.
Aap pareshan mat hon! Behray nay itminan say jawab di restaurant aik bajay tak khula rahe ga.
Yar pareshan kiun ho? Hostel mein rehnay walay aik larkay nay doosray say poocha.
Woh bola kia bataon yar! Ghar khat likha tha keh table lamp khareedna hai paisay bhej dein lekin inhon nay table lamp hi bhej dia hai.
Gayon mein aik shakhs ka inteqaal ho gia aik saheb tazyat kay liye in kay betay kay pas gaye aur poocha marhoom ko kia bimari thi.
Betay nay jawab mein kaha burhapa khood aik bimari hai.
Woh saheb bolay: Waqai hamaray mohallay mein bhi teen char bachay isi bimari mein maray hain.
Aik hotal kay bahir board laga tha keh khanay khoob kaiye bill aap kay potay ada karein gay aik shakhs nay khoob pait bhar kar khana khaya thori der baad wetter bil lay kar aagia who shakhs hairan hua keh yeh bil kaisa hai? Wetter nay kaha yeh is khany ka bill hai jo aap kay DADA na.
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
Santa Banta Jokes Funny Urdu JOkes Poetry Shayari Sms Quotes Covers Pictures Pics Questions Cover PHotos
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