Santa Banta Jokes Hindi Biography
Source(google.com.pk)
A visitor to Santa, "Which is Mr Banta's flat?"
Santa: Please come with me.
The visitor is taken on stairs to the 3rd floor.
The visitor rings the bell and there is no response. He rings it again and again and still no one answers. Visitor: I think he is not in. Santa: Yeah, he has gone out. He'll be back in the evening!
Ladka: Tumhaara naam kya hai?
Ladki: Kyun bataun? Main tumhe jaanti tak nahin.
Ladka: Theek hai, mat batao, main kaun sa tumhe apni BMW mein bitha raha hun.
Ladki: Mein Sheila hun, B.Com second year mein padti hun. Saamne waali gali mein seedhe haath ki tarf chauthe number pe ghar hai mera - House number 322B top floor. Ghar mein mummy, papa aur ek chota brother hai. Aur haan, shaam ko 6-8 baje tak tution jaati hun.
Ladka: Ok, thanks, jis din BMW lunga us din zaroor bithaunga.
An overweight colleague of mine decided it was time to shed some excess pounds. He took his new diet seriously, even changing his driving route to avoid his .
One morning, however, he arrived at work carrying a gigantic coffeecake. We all scolded him, but his smile remained cherubic.
"This is a very special coffeecake," he explained. "I accidentally drove by the bakery this morning and there in the window were a host of goodies. I felt this was no accident, so I prayed, 'Lord, if you want me to have one of those delicious coffeecakes, let me have a parking place directly in front of the bakery.'
"And sure enough," he continued, "the eighth time around the block, there it was!"Malik, apne aalsi naukar se: Yahan par itne sare machchar goon-goon kar rahen hain, tu in sabko maar de.
Thodi der baad Malik: Oye aalsi kahin ke, maine tujhe machchar maarne ko kaha tha abhi tak tune mare nahin? Woh ab bhi goonn-goon kar rahe hain.
Aalsi naukar: Malik machchar toh maine saare maar diye hain. Yeh toh unki biwiyaan hain jo vidhva ho kar ro rahi hain.
Hubby: Ye kyaa tum ek aur suit le aayi ? Abhi parso hee to...
Wife chilla kar boli: Kyaa parso? Bolo..... Bolo kyaa kahaa tum ne? Phir se bolna zara ek baar. Ab chup kyun ho gaye, ruk kyon gaye? Kyaa parso, Parso kyaa, Bolo jaldi, Jaldi bolo, Bataa-O bhi ab, kyaa parso? Matlab kya hai tumhara? Kehna kya chahte ho... kya Kehna chahte ho?
Hubby: Kuchh nahi, main bus yeh keh rahaa thaa ki parso bhi ek hee suit laayi thi pagli, aaj to do le aati.....
Father Murphy walks into a pub in Donegal, and asks the first man he meets, "Do you want to go to heaven?"
The man said, "I do, Father."
The priest said, "Then stand over there against the wall."
Then the priest asked the second man, "Do you want to go to heaven?"
'Certainly, Father,' the man replied.
"Then stand over there against the wall," said the priest.
Then Father Murphy walked up to O'Toole and asked, "Do you want to go to heaven?"
O'Toole said, "No, I don't Father."
The priest said, "I don't believe this! You mean to tell me that when you die you don't want to go to heaven?"
O'Toole said, "Oh, when I die, yes. I taut you was getting a group together to go right now!"
Chintu chup ke cigarette pee raha tha, tabhi us ke papa aa gaye. Chintu ne ghabrahat mein, jaldi se cigarette shirt ki jeb mein chupa li.
Papa, gusse se: Kya tum cigarette pee rahe the?
Chintu: Nahin toh...
Papa: Toh phir tumhari shirt se yeh dhuwan kyun nikal raha hai?
Chintu: Papa aap ne baat hi dil jalane wali ki hai toh dhuan toh niklega hi.
It's Christmas time and Bill and Joe decided to go look for a Christmas Tree. They gathered their axe, a sled, and a broom to brush the trees off so they can get a good look at them. When they finally reach a fine stand of trees, Joe brushes off the first tree, and stands back with Bill to look at it.
"Well, Bill, What do you think?"
"Sorry, Joe, this tree won't do. Let's try another one."
They come upon another nice tree, Joe brushes it off, and they both look at it.
"How about this one, Bill?"
"Not quite, Joe. Let's keep looking".
This goes on until nightfall. Both Bill and Joe are cold, tired, and hungry.
"Well, Bill, what do we do now?"
"Joe, I think we should take home the next tree we find, whether it has lights on it or not..."
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